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Mad, Sexist and Above All Brilliant Vintage Christmas Ads (Part 2)

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Here’s another supply of advertising from Christmases past.  Don’t forget to check out last season’s edition: Mad, Sexist And Above All Brilliant Vintage Christmas Ads (part 1).

 

1956

In 1956 women had late night fantasies of being gifted a sewing machine.

1932 filmo xmas

Dad decided that only a $245 camera would do…. this is a 1932 advert.  That’s $4,246 in today’s dollars!

 

1965

The 1965 Class of Alcoholics Anonymous.  Perhaps, the choice of graduation gifts could’ve been more thought through.

 

brook xmas 3

Yes, the doll is immensely unnerving, but the young Brook Shields is amazing.

 

1953

Having a little girl in the picture just made things creepy.

 

typewriter 1976 xmas

Yes, since Biblical days, the rite of manhood has been the sacred Gifting of the Typewriter.   This advert is from 1976 – it wouldn’t be long before the typewriter would go the way of the abacus and daguerreotype.

 

1946 xmas

Which one’s the best?  Hmmm.  The “extra hug” and and “kiss for every jewel” (and she’ll call you “sir” watches are nice.  But, I’ll have  the “one [censored] coming right up” watch instead.

 

xmas mojud

That knowing look from Kris Kringle is a bit troubling.  I suppose Santa has needs too.

1944

Kids – look away!  There is a Santa Claus… despite how this irresponsible 1944 advert looks.  Bell and Howell are dicks.

 

 

xmas advert 1974

Who needs mistletoe when you’ve got Scotch whiskey.  A bit troubling.  But point made.

 

xmas tv heaven

Everything’s so white….is this what Christmas looks like in Heaven?

 

 

1946 Ad Bower Roller Bearings

1946 Ad Bower Roller Bearings advert…. strange that there would even be an advert for roller bearings in the first place.  Even stranger it would feature girls in sexy Christmas costumes.

 

1966

Okay, we’ve got Helen, Carol, Anna and Sue covered…. but what about Mabel in the middle?

If she’s the one actually buying the gifts, it seems a bit odd she’d call them “romantic”, “a flirt” and “feminine”…. so what’s the story here?

 

 

1965 a

Admittedly, ball point pens aren’t nearly as sexy when they’re not being held by a mod honey in a miniskirt.

 

1966 nuts

This couple literally seems on the point of tears over the sight of their gift of Christmas nuts.  Suffice it to say, this mom and dad are easy to buy for.

 

xmas coke

Supposedly, they stopped putting cocaine in Coca-Cola in 1903; however, this 1962 advert, proclaiming a special ‘zing’ down to your toes, makes me think it was a bit later.

 

mattell 1966

(Well, I’m utterly depressed.)   Now with real human tears!

 

1956 xmas list

“Making out the Christmas list”…. but it looks like Christmas came early for Junior.

 

 

1966 avon

(wolf whistle) Christmas punk blowing never looked so sexy.

  • NGO

    Wow! $795 for a color TV? What year did that hit the market?

  • Liz Cooper

    Good to see that the Cutex nail polish is “spillpruf.” Why spell “proof” in a cutesy way? Does it save time and printing effort to use four letters rather than five? Or is “pruf” some hipster slang spelling that the mod cats and kittens would be hep to? Just wondering….

  • ‘Yes, since Biblical days, the rite of manhood has been the sacred Gifting of the Typewriter’ – cracked me up, maybe more than it should have? Still wondering about Mabel in the Cutex advert – is that Mabel or Madam?