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Album Cover Fashion Horrors

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To catalog every fashion horror perpetrated on an album cover would literally fill up the internet – we wouldn’t want that to happen.  Instead, we’ll just give you a taste of some of the worst offenders.  Enjoy.


album cover fashion (7)

She looks like some kind of half human – half jellyfish that washed ashore.  The album title should read “I Love to Sting” instead.


album cover fashion (1)

I think they were intending to look tough… instead, they look like a flamboyantly gay breakdancing troupe.


album cover fashion (3)

So much seventies fashion going on here… too much to take in at once.  We have a variety of styles on display: from top left (1) pimptastic disco godfather, (2) soul casanova, (3) Saturday Night Fever done badly, (3) creepy unemployed uncle, and (4) coke dealer.


album cover fashion (4)

For more in this vein: Swedish Dance Bands Of The 1970s: Whipped Hair And No Underwear


los vecinos album

Los Vecinos obviously stopped by the Banana Republic before their album cover photo shoot.  You can tell the guy on the right is already regretting his decision to wear shorts.  At least he didn’t choose a see-through blouse….


mirzino jato

“I can’t believe I let the girls talk me into this…. the guys at the pub are going to never going to let me live this down.”


album cover fashion (11)

I just love how Julie matches here eye shadow with her shammy.  Brilliant.


album cover fashion (10)

Would you buy bananas from these people?  I think not.


album cover fashion (9)

Fact: For the duration of human history, going shirtless with a vest and ascot has never been a good look.  However, I am impressed with the vest o’silver.


album cover fashion (12)

Another group I wouldn’t by bananas from.  I wonder if anyone alerted Michael Jackson that Altamira was stealing his laundry.


album cover fashion (5)

If your kids ever ask you if collars were really big in the seventies, I want you to show them this and then quietly walk away.


vintage vinyl (22)

Each member gives us a personal reminder of how bad disco fashion was: (1) Cosby sweater with pink pants with rope belt, (2) Ronald McDonald disco-wear, (3) random strange fabric attached above the right knee, and (4) tight fitting silver lame slacks.  This is what happens when you let cocaine design your wardrobe.


religious family album (17)

Of course, when it comes to album cover fashion atrocities, nothing compares to the religious/gospel album covers of the seventies.  For more of this than you’re likely able to handle, check out: Polyester Prayers: Gospel Family Album Covers of the Seventies


vintage vinyl (21)

For an article on bad album cover fashion, this is a jackpot indeed.

  • Forget Altimara stealing M.J’s clothes. What about Kenny stealing the “K” from Kelloggs of Battle Creek?

  • Realist

    Wrong…the “11th House” guy in the lower left is a Klingon !…and..I love the guy with the pathetic comb over (we see so often) in the Walkers.

  • Liz Cooper

    Why do you suppose the Walkers’ album cover has the same photo printed five times? Are we supposed to be fooled into thinking they are different by some of them being printed in reverse?

    Also, regarding the Gran Manzanas’ cover… I agree that they are probably trying to look tough, but three of them are wearing fanny packs. Who looks tough wearing a fanny pack?? In addition, two guys (and only two) are wearing matching pants. Do you think they were all supposed to show up dressed alike, but two of them decided to do their own thing at the last minute? Or was one of the guys mad? “Duane, you are such a copy cat! You knew I was going to wear my skull and crossbones pants, and what do you do? You run out and buy a pair just like them!”

    The fashion disasters in the final album in the list leaves me rendered speechless. especially the bib.