Demonic Laundromats and Vampire Motorcycles: 15 Ridiculous Movie Monsters

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(1) Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (1977)

Comedian Patton Oswalt has a great bit about this film, joking that it has inspired him to write Rape Stove: The Stove That Rapes People.

(2) Blades (1989)

This one involves a killer lawnmower which wreaks havoc upon unwary golfers. A classic for the ages.

 

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(3) I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle (1990)

“Most Motorcycles Run On Petrol, This One Runs On Blood!”

 

 

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(4) The Mangler (1995)

The greatest movie about a demonic laundromat ever produced. There is simply nothing scarier than a possessed folding machine.

(5) Octaman (1971)

He may be half octopus, but he is full retard.

 

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(6) The Crawlers (1993)

It’s about radioactive tree roots. I don’t think anything else needs to be said.

 

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(7) Killdozer (1974)

A TV movie about a bulldozer possessed by some blue stuff from outer space which makes it want to kill people. Bulldozer-human relations already were strained – this was the last thing they needed.

 

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(8) The Killer Shrews (1959)

 

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(9) The Monolith Monsters (1957)

Zombies, vampires and masked boogeymen make for scary movie baddies… but what about murderous water-absorbing silicon monoliths? So underrated.

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(10) The Lift (1983)

The elevator is exhibiting wildly erratic behavior – whatever shall we do? (Answer: Take the stairs)

 

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(11) The Refrigerator (1991)

(12) Attack of the Killer Refrigerator (1990)

The early 1990s are known as the Golden Age of Evil Refrigerator Movies.

 

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(13) Dial: Help (1988)

The monsters here are killer phones (As I recall, possessed by the evil spirit of a dead phone operator).  Their cords would strangle the victims…. which, in today’s cordless world, seems wildly outdated – like being attacked by demonic floppy disks.  Here’s the trailer…

 

 

(14) Blood Beach (1980)

Yes, you thought a shark was scary, how about killer beach sand?

 

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  (15) Attack of the Killer Tomatoes (1978)

Killer tomatoes are great, but let it be known that there are many more odd and ridiculous movie monsters: killer snowmen (Jack Frost, 1997), killer rabbits (Night of the Lepus, 1977), and even killer robot mall cops (Chopping Mall, 1986).  Of course, if we wanted to cover more recent films, that opens up a wide array of cinematic turds to choose from:  ThanksKilling (2009) with a killer turkey, Sharknado (2013), Evil Bong (2006), The Gingerdead Man (2005) – yes, that’s a killer gingerbread man, and Rubber (2010) literally about a killer tire.

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