Dear Me: Letters by Famous Faces to Their Teenage Selves

Alun CummingAmongst letters to their 16-year-old selves, writer Stephen King advises against taking recreational drugs. Musician Alice Cooper has words of romance –  “Trashy girls are exciting for about five minutes… Keep your eye out for a good-lookin’ church girl. Then you’ll have the best of both worlds”. And the actress Gillian Anderson says, “You are completely and utterly self obsessed. If you spent a quarter of your time thinking about others instead of how much you hate your thighs, your level of contentment and self worth would expand exponentially.”

Here’s a selection of bon mots delivered by successful adults from Dear Me: A letter to my 16-year-old self:

Debbie Harry

Dear Debbie, Moon, Debeel, or Deb,

Just because you have a lot of different names, and maybe feel like there’s a lot of different yours, don’t be confused. Give yourself some time and all the ideas and possibilities that these names conjure up for you will become clear to you. The pieces of the puzzle will reveal themselves and all you have to do is keep finding out what makes you feel happiest and this oftentimes will be the easiest thing for you to do. This is remarkable in itself. That the most obvious is often the best choice and can lead to something wonderful and satisfying.”

~ Debbie Harry

 

Sandra Bernhard

 

 

Alan Cumming

Dear Alan,

First of all, you’re right. You’re right about who you think is wrong. You’re right to trust your instincts and to be your own person.

Second of all. slow down. Before you know it you’ll be away from home and you’ll be living your own life. Don’t waste energy trying to make time move faster, because it won’t until one day when you don’t want it to and you’ll wonder if all those nights spent longing for the future are now being paid back by making a beautiful present more fleeting. So please, if only for my karmic peace of mind, chill out about it, ok?

You’re going to be really, really happy one day and you’re going to have a life that is so far from your comprehension right now that I’m not even going to try to explain how it happens. I can hardly work it out for myself. You just have to go with the flow, Alan. Just let go and tumble through life. It will all be okay.

But it’s not a commercial. There are really shitty bits. You don’t even know it but right now there are things happening to you that are too painful to process and so, like the adults around you, you’re just not dealing with them, suppressing them, locking them up in a box in your mind. When you’re 28, that box is going to explode open and tear your life apart. Everything will change and there will be much pain and it will take you a long time to recover. But recover you will, and it will ultimately make you a better person, and those you love will benefit too.

You’re going to have lots of sex and you’re going to feel sexy. Don’t worry. Just try and remember that it’s better for you to feel sexy about yourself than for other people to tell you you are. It’s going to be okay.

In 1997 you’ll meet someone in New York at the party for the opening of ‘Titanic – the Musical’. Now, I am not one for regrets, Alan, and I truly believe that everything you experience between 16 and now all contributes to make you the really happy person that you become, so how could I wish any of it to be different? But, come on, the show is called ‘Titanic’, that should be an omen. Walk away from this person. You’ll never make them not be angry. Later on you’ll see a pattern of you trying to fix angry people and you’ll be able to break it, so do yourself a favour and walk away, let this one be the first. He will try to destroy you. He won’t, but he’ll try very hard.

You will love and be loved and be rich beyond your wildest dreams, and the best thing about this richness is that it has nothing to do with money. It’s all going to be okay.

A teacher at drama school is going to tell you that’ll you’ll never make it as a professional actor. He is wrong. Wrong to say it, and just wrong because you do okay. Try not to let it dent you too much.

You’re never going to have children, Alan. You’re going to try, in relationships with both women and men, but it doesn’t happen, and that’s okay too. Right now you have the happiest family anyone could wish for.

It really is all going to be okay. I’ll see you in 29 years. Enjoy it.

Alan x

Kathleen Turner

Dear 16-year-old me,

I am writing to you from forty years passed by, I love your passion and confidence, and want to tell you that you are right. You are about to have your world destroyed; the safety and security you feel now, taken away. Know that you have been taught well, both in character and tools for learning. The lessons you have been given about love, loyalty, fairness, and determination will pay off. A few cautions: do not let your sense of humor, of the absurd, slip. Try to remember that what is happening at the moment is only that – a moment. Try the “count to five rule.” Before reacting, before exploding, count to five.

You will be told that your dreams are absurd, childish fantasies. Don’t believe anyone, however much they mean well. Trust that core that tells you your dreams are true. This is very hard because you have no way of knowing yet that you are, but rely on that darned stubbornness you are told is a fault.

Value loved ones and let them know you do.

You will never be completely alone.

Give freely without considering the cost; it will never be too much.

Finally, love yourself. No one will be a harsher critic, so give yourself a break, OK?

Kathleen Turner

John Waters

April 5, 2010Dear John,

Be angry now, like you are because when you get older it isn’t so attractive. “Pissed off” at 16 is sexy, at 64 it’s spinning your wheels.

xx
John

Gene Hackman

Gene–

Hey, daddy-o, what’s up. Hear you been hanging our at the post office talking yo those jarhead recruits about joining up. The Marines are a great outfit but there’s plenty of time, plowboy. Finish school first.

What’s with mom talking to you after the picture who about Errol Flynn and acting? What do you think? In any case, you decide to be an actor, you’d probably be banned from the neighborhood.

Coach Ave at school might be worthing listening to. His advice about Hemingway, reading the classics, and applying yourself could be beneficial.

If you did decide to take up acting, many you should think about New York instaead of Hollywood. It might be easier. Hahaha.

 

More letters here.