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3 Highly Disturbing Vintage Ads From The 70s And 80s

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EVER been scared by an advert?

 

Have Her In Stitches (literally)

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THIS advertisement comes from a 1982 Canadian newspaper. Notice anything particularly troubling about it?

I’m somewhat okay with the four guys manhandling a bikini clad girl. It’s the “sex sells” approach –a time honored marketing tradition. Although, I can’t shake this creepy vibe that I’m looking at a fateful moment before things got dark. Before the jail time, the lives shattered…

But my real problem lies with Bachelor #2. You know the one that’s maniacally cannibalizing this poor woman’s arm…

 

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There has to be a perfectly reasonable explanation for this: temporary psychosis, bath salts, extreme hunger? All his friends seem so normal, and here’s this crazed fellow violently chomping away at her forearm.

 

 

An Elaborate Suicide

 

His & Hers Neiman Marcus Christmas Catalog

 

This Christmas consider buying your spouse a dead-eyed replica of yourself. Nothing says the holidays like the vacant stare of your lifeless clone.

Imagine the joy your spouse will feel upon discovering your hollow likeness lurking under the Christmas tree. (Full money back guarantee if it doesn’t come to life and kill your family.)

 

 

Because A Home Cinema Is Not Just For Snuff Movies

 

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This quaint little advert for 8mm films and projections comes from a 1978 comic book. Exactly what kind of audience are they marketing to? I assume they’re trying to target the huge serial killer customer base.

If I’m reading this ad correctly, they are suggesting we invite some ‘orrible friends home… specifically, friends who happen to be bestial bloodthirsty rapists. I assume “cut throat prices” is code for going ahead and murdering the female guests.

Call me a finicky shopper, but I think I’ll be buying my projector at a store that doesn’t cater to deranged killers.